Some Truth’s about Men and Women Becoming Empowered
Many have said, especially women about men, that men are still living in the dark ages, and that all they really want from life is food, sex, and sleep, not necessarily always in that order. Many men have also said about women, that they spend more time being in drama about what they think they feel, instead of just expressing their feeling’s and emotions.
By now, especially if you’re reading this men’s blog, you know, that there are many men that have, or are in the process of evolving from that basic evolutionary “dark period.” With the individual growth of each man, in becoming responsible for their emotions in relationship with them selves, with women, and humanity, from my perspective, is becoming more sustainable for each one.
What I’m hearing from men today, is something new, they want to hear from women important in their lives, how they are feeling about something, instead of the drama of it all. It seems that humanity is becoming more responsible for them selves, especially when dealing and becoming emotionally accountable. This could in fact, resonates more with truth, honesty, and compassion as responsible human beings.
Here’s, a few examples of what mature responsible men would like to hear from women in their lives:
Not: “You make me so happy, I don’t know what I would do with out you. I can’t live with out you.”
To: “I make my self happy while being relational with you. I know that I truly don’t need you, but want you in my life. I have great respect for you and at the same time, some times I disagree with you on some points, knowing that we both learn from each other, and help each other grow as individuals and as a couple that’s in relationship.
Not: “I need you to be with me so I can feel good about me. You’re my reason for living.”
To: “I’ve chosen you, not because I’m needy, but because I want you in my life. I’m committed to our relationship, and at the same time, I have a life of my own. I want to take care of my self, as best I can moment to moment, so that I can be a better partner for our relationship.”
Understanding that the word has the power to create, change, shift, express, we become aware of the importance of the word, action, and reaction, all the way to our thoughts.
What do you think, feel, about the examples above, are you presently hearing the “Not” from your partner, or are you getting more of the “To.”
What other statements could you classify as “Not,” and “To,” that you would like to share with us reading this men’s blog, thanks… luis
5 comments
The althernative answers given by men on how they would like women to react are great in theory. In practise I have found men to be threatened by independant women.
Somewhere in between the theory of men not wanting needy childlike women, and women not wanting needy boys, there is a half way point out there to meet.
We all at some point like to be taken care of when were feeling low.
That is very different from being totally dependant on the other person. Drama, is something I have found in both men and women. Its a state of mind, and the spiritual work teaches you to get over yourself and view things from a higher point, whereby you can express yourself without being neither Elizabeth Taylor nor Richard Burton.
wow luis you hit on a great one !.. so much to say and so difficult to respond.. i feel the world is waking up both men and women. awareness is growing…. i have always felt in my story that men search and need from a woman, validation … on what he does and who is is, warmth, and gentleness… and for god’s sake as little or no drama … it most certainly is not sex food etc.. NOT that that is of utmost importance to men.. but underneath all is his need for validation warmth gentleness …from a woman….. that is part of my story … rafa
Thank you SG for your comment on the last blog. My apology, what I meant to express with the example, was that we as humans in general, irrelevant to gender, can start looking at creating a greater self-awareness and self-development focus, by healing what keeps us needy of others and not being independent and whole, especially while being in relationship with beloved. I believe my example reflected the bias of this men’s blog, and at the same time, we welcome women giving their input to men’s issues.
We may all want to get a better understanding between the definition of “needing,” and “wanting.” From my perspective, the needing, comes from the mind, which is mostly fueled by fear, and the wanting that comes from the heart, is fueled by the unlimited projections of Spirit, and as humans, the highest level beings in this planet earth, we can open to deserve all the “good” coming to us. As human being’s we all have an opportunity of being more emotionally responsible, by having a deeper sense, as well as expression our feelings, and emotions, moment to moment.
When one is not connected to mind and heart, others that live independent lives can threaten those that are not connected. Understanding that being independent, does not mean isolated from their feelings and emotions, beloved, family, and community, but has individual interest along with partner, family, and community, knowing that humans can hold as much as they want and are able to deal with, and enjoy in their lives. Yes, SG, we all want to care for our selves, and partners, as well as been taken care of, especially in necessity, as long as either does not loose their integrity.
So true, that Drama is held by both genders, I have seen women displaying more due to their deeper connection, and awareness of their emotional body, than their mental mind, especially nearing their change in life. In turn, men are more connected with the thinking and doing, and less with the feeling and being aspects of life, which is why we men do this Self Mastery Teaching for men, that this blog supports. For us men, it’s about being equally, or as much as we can be, with our mind and heart’s in all we do and are. I believe this will help us come to the “half way point” you talk about. I might ad that we men also reach our “change of life,” and I believe that if we are more aware of your feelings and emotions before and during this period, we won’t have to act out this change of life with others, but as we express our feelings and emotions, we men can alleviate this period of life.
As we learn how to hold our own emotional body by doing our mental, and emotional individual work, we create a solid spiritual framework to view this human dream from a much different, and bigger perspective. SG, again thank you for your comment to this blog… luis
Hello Rafael, thank you for your comment. Yes, we are blessed in that we humans are awakening, and that our awareness is constantly growing and deepening. I’d like to ask you a question, what does it tell you when men need to find validation from women?
Would it not be wonderful if we men could find that validation within us, so that we won’t have the need to get that from other’s, especially from our partners in relationship. Yes, it’s grand and loving when we get an understanding from our partners of what we do in life to support our selves, our beloved, our families, and communities, and yet, when we expect that validation from our partners, it only shows that we are not giving that to our selves. The woman you may be talking about, may be the feminine in you, you own emotional body that you want validation from.
To do that, we men need to start creating a different sense of being relational, that all starts within. We may need to start wooing, connecting, owning and expressing, our own feelings and emotions, not from a place of anger, and or rage, but to get that part of us, our “woman” to join us in this journey of the beloved, through sharing and expressing what we are feeling. As that part in us, that is our feminine, our emotional body, starts to validate us, we won’t need validation from the out side, but we can get our own warmth, gentleness from that in us.
We may also want to remember that our story… Well, it’s only a story, which can be rewritten again and again, bringing in a new and self-relational, supporting, and loving plot to your new story. Gracias Rafa… luis
Your answer was just what I neeedd. Its made my day!
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