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Posts from — September 2011

The Over Controlling, and Overbearing Mother

This copy was submitted for EmpoweringMen.com by one of our followers, I feel it has merit, especially for the boys, that are now men with similar mothers:

“Last week I was away with some friends.  Two couples and their children.  I witnessed the domestication process of a two-year-old boy by his mother and found the experience very uncomfortable, it provoked a lot of anger in me.

Basically, the child is being smothered by his mother’s “Love,” or need to be Loved.  He at two is holding onto her apron strings, he whimpers when she leaves the room and runs to her when she returns.  He just doesn’t know how to just be himself (already!) She relishes the need to be needed, to be the centre of his world to wrap him in cotton wool and all this is without awareness on her behalf.  She was adopted and I feel that she very much wants to be the mother to him that she did not have in her biological mother so I can see, from my point of view at least where she is coming from in her behavior.

The experience offered me a great opportunity to connect to the wound of the victim of my own domestication by a controlling overbearing mother.  I was the other side of the wrapping in cotton wool but similarly it shows me a lack of respect for the boy like it was an attack on his/ my masculinity or that it was disrespecting his /my space to just be.  Now I’m learning to respect myself, and my creation of these wounds need my forgiveness and compassion for the feminine doing her very best to be the loving mother that she truly wants to be.

I feel that this might be relevant to share with other men on the blog if you feel it is suitable.” Jason

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September 19, 2011   No Comments